I’m proud of your love…

I promise you an endless love

that will never change

My love to you will always exist

to comfort you through the hard times

I promise you an endless love

that will support you

All through the long way

My love to you is like the sun

that will bright all your life

And warm you through the cold nights

My arms will always be open

to hold you very tight

My Love to you is not like the wind

that blows and soon goes away

My love to you is like the air

that surrounds you from everywhere

My life is like a candle in your hand

to light your life

When you are afraid of the darkness

And blow it off when you are safe

this candle will always light your way

Untill it melt away

Remember

that there is a heart that will beat

for you forever

Only you.. no one else

I promise you

Love that will never die

Even if my soul leaves this world

My love to you will stay going on

to guide you through the years

to help you & give you hope

to give you all i can ever give

And remember

that I’m here for you

Whenever you need me

I promise you

Love with no limits

that don’t know how to stop?

I’ll love you till the end of time

But please don’t pitty me

Or even think that I’m suffering

No baby.. I love you

I’m happy to love this pure love

And I’ll never give you up

I’m proud of my love to you

And I’ll protect it till I lie in my grave

Cause my love to you is so devine

My love to you

Don’t know how to hate? !

Don’t know how to hurt? !

My love to you

Don’t know how to betray? !

Or how to pretend? !

My love only knows FORGIVENESS

My love to you

is tenderness, understanding and giving

Without expecting to take back

My love to you

Holds the truth & reality

My love to you

Makes me smile

though I feel the pain inside

My love to you

Never makes me feel weak

But it makes me feel strong

Whenever I look into your eyes

My love to you

Makes me accept my Life to be in your hands

And love you as you are

With your bad points before the good ones

My love to you

Is not affected with what people say

My love to you

Will never change with their blames

My love to you

Never makes me think of all the lovers around me

My love to you

Makes me feel what the real love is? !

that doesn’t exist in our world!

My love to you

Makes me feel distinguished from others

And never feel ashamed

I’m proud of my love to you

New poem

Sorry for not writing for quite some time…

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Sonkwaiatison

Our world began with the creation of the Earth, which is seen as the horizontal plane that separates the world above from the world below. In the Sky-World lived a fellow named “The Sky Holder.” Next to his lodge was the Great Tree of Light, for which he was the caretaker. The flowers of this tree gave off bright light. His wife, named “Mature Flowers,” fell through a hole created when he uprooted that tree at her urging. She fell into the dark world below, a world of endless water. The water animals decided to save her because she had the power to create life. The birds flew up and caught her in their inter-locked wings. They decided to place her on the back of a giant snapping turtle. The muskrat was the only animal that could dive deep enough to retrieve some mud from the bottom of the sea. The mud was placed on the back of the turtle and it began to grow. As she walked about in an ever-expanding circle, the mud grew into an island. Each day she walked counterclockwise and the island expanded. The Iroquois still dance in that direction to honor the Creation. Seeds fell from her clothing and began to sprout in the fresh Earth. She then gave birth to a daughter who later had many suitors from the male beings who could transform themselves into human form. She selected the being that wore scalloped leggings and a large robe, said to be a turtle being. He placed two arrows over her body at night, and she became pregnant. She had twins, but died giving birth to the second son, as he was born through her armpit. The Sky Woman buried her daughter and from her body grew the Three Sisters – Corn, Beans and Squash. From her heart grew the tobacco plant, which we still use as a way to carry our thought to the Sky World. The deceased daughter became known as Earth Mother.

The good-minded twin was named “He Grasps the Sky With Both Hands,” and his evil-minded brother was named “Flint – The Mischievous One.” The good-minded brother set about to create plants, animals and birds. In the sky he placed our Grandmother the Moon, our Elder Brother the Sun (Day Bringer), the Morning Star, and the Milky Way as the path to the Sky World. He created the cycles of day and night, of the changing seasons.

His evil-minded brother, in trying to imitate his brother’s work, created thistles, thorns, bats, monsters, and serpents, as well as rapids in the rivers, winter in the seasons, and other things that would make life on the new Earth difficult for the people that were about to be created. The evil-minded brother fought his good-minded brother for dominance in the newly created world. They played lacrosse to a draw. This is why lacrosse is still played today, as it is a way to manifest the classic struggle of good over evil. They held a wrestling match but were of equal strength. However, the evil-minded one was finally defeated by being struck by a deer antler and banished from the Earth. The Universe was divided into two spheres of power. The evil-minded one was sent underground, where he would rule over the serpents and powers of the deep. He would also have dominion over the night. The good-minded brother would be responsible for life on Earth and have dominion over the day. Forever, the two brothers would be opposing powers of our universe and the idea of duality is introduced.

The grandmother had favored Flint and tried to have him return to the Earth, but she lost her authority to the good-minded twin after losing a dice game. That game is still played in the ceremonies today, again as a way to relive the events from the time of creation and teach us to take both success and failure in stride.

The good-minded one then went about creating many things in the new world. First he took yellowish bark from a tree and created the Asian people. He then took the foam from the great salt sea and created the Caucasian people. He created African people from the rich, black soil. The good-minded one created a man that he named “Sapling” and a woman he named “Growing Flower,” from the reddish clay. He breathed life into them. But all the races began to fight over a shinny object and had to be sent to four different quarters of the world, each in their own land. The basic element of four is introduced into our world view.

The good-minded brother taught the people the use of the plants and animals, ceremonies of thanksgiving and to live in harmony and peace. We have come to refer to him as Sonkwaiatison, “The Creator.” Before departing from the Earth, he struck a deal with the people. We are to protect his gifts of Creation and be respectful of all living things, and were to simply be thankful for all that he has provided, as he has given us all that we need to live a happy life. In return for showing thanks, he would strive to keep the cycles of life continuing for the benefit of the people.

محاولة لقتل امرأة لا تقتل

وعدتُكِ أن لا أُحِبَّكِ..

ثُمَّ أمامَ القرار الكبيرِ، جَبُنْتْ

وعدتُكِ أن لا أعودَ…

وعُدْتْ…

وأن لا أموتَ اشتياقاً

ومُتّْ

وعدتُ مراراً

وقررتُ أن أستقيلَ مراراً

ولا أتذكَّرُ أني اسْتَقَلتْ…

وعدتُ بأشياء أكبرَ منّي..

فماذا غداً ستقولُ الجرائدُ عنّي؟

أكيدٌ.. ستكتُبُ أنّي جُنِنْتْ..

أكيدٌ.. ستكتُبُ أنّي انتحرتْ

وعدتُكِ..

أن لا أكونَ ضعيفاً… وكُنتْ..

وأن لا أقولَ بعينيكِ شعراً..

وقُلتْ…

وعدتُ بأَنْ لا …

وأَنْ لا..

وأَنْ لا …

وحين اكتشفتُ غبائي.. ضَحِكْتْ…

وَعَدْتُكِ..

أن لا أُبالي بشَعْرِكِ حين يمرُّ أمامي

وحين تدفَّقَ كالليل فوق الرصيفِ..

صَرَخْتْ..

وعدتُكِ..

أن أتجاهَلَ عَيْنَيكِ ، مهما دعاني الحنينْ

وحينَ رأيتُهُما تُمطرانِ نجوماً…

شَهَقْتْ…

وعدتُكِ..

أنْ لا أوجِّهَ أيَّ رسالة حبٍ إليكِ..

ولكنني – رغم أنفي – كتبتْ

وعَدْتُكِ..

أن لا أكونَ بأيِ مكانٍ تكونينَ فيهِ..

وحين عرفتُ بأنكِ مدعوةٌ للعشاءِ..

ذهبتْ..

وعدتُكِ أن لا أُحِبَّكِ..

كيفَ؟

وأينَ؟

وفي أيِّ يومٍ تُراني وَعَدْتْ؟

لقد كنتُ أكْذِبُ من شِدَّة الصِدْقِ،

والحمدُ لله أني كَذَبْتْ….

وَعَدْتُ..

بكل بُرُودٍ.. وكُلِّ غَبَاءِ

بإحراق كُلّ الجسور ورائي

وقرّرتُ بالسِّرِ، قَتْلَ جميع النساءِ

وأعلنتُ حربي عليكِ.

وحينَ رفعتُ السلاحَ على ناهديْكِ

انْهَزَمتْ..

وحين رأيتُ يَدَيْكِ المُسالمْتينِ..

اختلجتْ..

وَعَدْتُ بأنْ لا .. وأنْ لا .. وأنْ لا ..

وكانت جميعُ وعودي

دُخَاناً ، وبعثرتُهُ في الهواءِ.

وَغَدْتُكِ..

أن لا أُتَلْفِنَ ليلاً إليكِ

وأنْ لا أفكّرَ فيكِ، إذا تمرضينْ

وأنْ لا أخافَ عليكْ

وأن لا أقدَّمَ ورداً…

وأن لا أبُوسَ يَدَيْكْ..

وَتَلْفَنْتُ ليلاً.. على الرغم منّي..

وأرسلتُ ورداً.. على الرغم منّي..

وبِسْتُكِ من بين عينيْكِ، حتى شبِعتْ

وعدتُ بأنْ لا.. وأنْ لا .. وأنْ لا..

وحين اكتشفتُ غبائي ضحكتْ…

وَعَدْتُ…

بذبحِكِ خمسينَ مَرَّهْ..

وحين رأيتُ الدماءَ تُغطّي ثيابي

تأكَّدتُ أنّي الذي قد ذُبِحْتْ..

فلا تأخذيني على مَحْمَلِ الجَدِّ..

مهما غضبتُ.. ومهما انْفَعَلْتْ..

ومهما اشْتَعَلتُ.. ومهما انْطَفَأْتْ..

لقد كنتُ أكذبُ من شدّة الصِدْقِ

والحمدُ لله أنّي كَذَبتْ…

وعدتُكِ.. أن أحسِمَ الأمرَ فوْراً..

وحين رأيتُ الدموعَ تُهَرْهِرُ من مقلتيكِ..

ارتبكْتْ..

وحين رأيتُ الحقائبَ في الأرضِ،

أدركتُ أنَّكِ لا تُقْتَلينَ بهذي السُهُولَهْ

فأنتِ البلادُ .. وأنتِ القبيلَهْ..

وأنتِ القصيدةُ قبلَ التكوُّنِ،

أنتِ الدفاترُ.. أنتِ المشاويرُ.. أنت الطفولَهْ..

وأنتِ نشيدُ الأناشيدِ..

أنتِ المزاميرُ..

أنتِ المُضِيئةُ..

أنتِ الرَسُولَهْ…

وَعَدْتُ..

بإلغاء عينيْكِ من دفتر الذكرياتِ

ولم أكُ أعلمُ أنّي سأُلغي حياتي

ولم أكُ أعلمُ أنِك..

– رغمَ الخلافِ الصغيرِ – أنا..

وأنّي أنتْ..

وَعَدْتُكِ أن لا أُحبّكِ…

– يا للحماقةِ –

ماذا بنفسي فعلتْ؟

لقد كنتُ أكذبُ من شدّة الصدقِ،

والحمدُ لله أنّي كَذَبتْ…

وَعَدْتُكِ..

أنْ لا أكونَ هنا بعد خمس دقائقْ..

ولكنْ.. إلى أين أذهبُ؟

إنَّ الشوارعَ مغسولةٌ بالمَطَرْ..

إلى أينَ أدخُلُ؟

إن مقاهي المدينة مسكونةٌ بالضَجَرْ..

إلى أينَ أُبْحِرُ وحدي؟

وأنتِ البحارُ..

وأنتِ القلوعُ..

وأنتِ السَفَرْ..

فهل ممكنٌ..

أن أظلَّ لعشر دقائقَ أخرى

لحين انقطاع المَطَرْ؟

أكيدٌ بأنّي سأرحلُ بعد رحيل الغُيُومِ

وبعد هدوء الرياحْ..

وإلا..

سأنزلُ ضيفاً عليكِ

إلى أن يجيءَ الصباحْ….

وعدتُكِ..

أن لا أحبَّكِ، مثلَ المجانين، في المرَّة الثانيَهْ

وأن لا أُهاجمَ مثلَ العصافيرِ..

أشجارَ تُفّاحكِ العاليَهْ..

وأن لا أُمَشّطَ شَعْرَكِ – حين تنامينَ –

يا قطّتي الغاليَهْ..

وعدتُكِ، أن لا أُضيعَ بقيّة عقلي

إذا ما سقطتِ على جسدي نَجْمةً حافيَهْ

وعدتُ بكبْح جماح جُنوني

ويُسْعدني أنني لا أزالُ

شديدَ التطرُّفِ حين أُحِبُّ…

تماماً، كما كنتُ في المرّة الماضيَهْ..

وَعَدْتُكِ..

أن لا أُطَارحَكِ الحبَّ، طيلةَ عامْ

وأنْ لا أخبئَ وجهي..

بغابات شَعْرِكِ طيلةَ عامْ..

وأن لا أصيد المحارَ بشُطآن عينيكِ طيلةَ عامْ..

فكيف أقولُ كلاماً سخيفاً كهذا الكلامْ؟

وعيناكِ داري.. ودارُ السَلامْ.

وكيف سمحتُ لنفسي بجرح شعور الرخامْ؟

وبيني وبينكِ..

خبزٌ.. وملحٌ..

وسَكْبُ نبيذٍ.. وشَدْوُ حَمَامْ..

وأنتِ البدايةُ في كلّ شيءٍ..

ومِسْكُ الختامْ..

وعدتُكِ..

أنْ لا أعودَ .. وعُدْتْ..

وأنْ لا أموتَ اشتياقاً..

ومُتّ..

وعدتُ بأشياءَ أكبرَ منّي

فماذا بنفسي فعلتْ؟

لقد كنتُ أكذبُ من شدّة الصدقِ،

والحمدُ للهِ أنّي كذبتْ….

قصيدة لالشاعر نظار قباني…

نفسي افهم

الناس غريبة جداً ليه؟ معرفش عندهم قدرات غريبة قدرات مبيحسوش بيها. قدرات أنا بعتبرها قدرات خارقة لكل قانون أي واحد يعرفه. بس اخطر قدرة هي القدرة علي الحكم بدون العلم. إزاي؟؟! الناس بتحكم علي اللي قدمهم من مجرد النظر إليهم حتي من غير ما يتكلم معاه أو حتي يعرف اسمه. ليه كده؟ نفسي اعرف. الناس ممكن تكره شخص حتي من غير ما يعرف اسمه مجرد انه حكم عليه من غير ما يعرفه. الناس ممكن تحكم عليك انك تافه حتي لو ميعرفوش انت بتفكر ازاي. أيه رأيك مش ديه قوة خارقة؟ أكيد تبعًا. ليه الناس بقيت كده؟ لا هما مبقوش كده هما طول عمرهم كده بيحبو الظلم ويطالبو بالعدل. يحكمو علي الناس وميحبوش يتحكم عليهم. يشتمو بعض في ضهر بعض. معرفش هل أنا اللي غلط و لا الناس اللي غلط. أنا بردو إنسان و عملت الغلط ده بس لما فكرت عرفت انه غلط و اعتزرت عنه و قررت إني عمري ما أعمله تاني و الحمدلله متكررش مني تاني. نفسي أنصح الناس تبطل الموضوع ده لأنه غلط غلط في حق نفس كل واحد بيعمل كده غلط في حقوق الناس و متقولش انت كده حر لا انت كده مش حر انت متحرر و في فرق كبير بين حر و متحرر. المتحرر هو الشخص اللي بيكسر قاعدة لكن الحر هو فعل ما تريد في وقت ما تريد دون الإضرار بحرية الأخرين و دون كسر أي قانون. لكن لما تفتكر أنك تقدر تحكم علي الناس من مجرد النظر اليهم و ديه بنسبالك حرية انت غلطان. لأنك بتضر حرية الأخرين لانه مطلوب منه يظهر بأحسن شكل قدامك علشان ميتحكمش عليه بشكل غلط من موقف ميقصدش بين اي حاجة. فيريت نبطل نحكم علي بعض من غير منعشر بعض من غير منفهم بعض لأن ده بيخسرنا بعض…

Nowhere is everywhere!

I know that fate has spread thorns on my way but I am stubborn.                                                      

I intervene with the fate.

I will not stop if it tries to  stop me, or even try to make me fall, I’ll keep on rising.

I will break the traps and spread my wings,    use all your power, but I would happily be beheaded than bow down 

As much as there is fire in the deserts, my blood boils in these veins hotter than that fire my ambition never stops.   

I like being silent,                                                        But I have been silent for long                                                   

I kept on tolerating but I can’t withstand anymore 

there are hundred question             

there are hundred condemnations                 

there is a lot of soot covering me

Someday my punishment will end but I will never forgive…

أصعب إحساس 

صعب اوصف احساس عاشق

لكن اكيد اقدر احس باحساسه

هشرحه … 

لما تحب وانت صادق

وتدي حبيبك روحك وتحس بنظراته

ولو يطلب حياتك تديهله و ماتكونش منافق

وتفديه بنفسك لأن همك راحته في حياته

ويوم يزعل ويكون  متضايق

تضم قلبه وتخفف عنه زعله و ضيقه

ويوم يبكي وهو بدموعه غارق

تمسح دموعه وتاخذ كل آلامه

ويوم يمرض والتعب كثير خانق

تسهر عشانه وتدعي الله يخفف ابتلائه

ويوم يضحك ويكون رايق

تبتسم دنياك وتحس بفرحته وضحكاته

هذا حالي معاه بحبه انا غارق

واللي قلته حالتي بكل لحظاته

عشان حبي اتحدى كل عائق

ولايقدر انسان يبعدني عنه بخطوه

أنا أحبه وكل كلمه من كلامي فيها واثق

واتبعه ودايم معه مثل ظلاله

هو ده احساس العاشق…

My Old Stuff Became Suddenly New…

These are a group of poems I wrote so long ago in a diary that I taught I lost but I found it lately. One was for my old love the person who caused me the most emberrsing moment in mylife causing me to never love again, another one was just for entertainment, and one was for a close person who is resting in peace…


FLESH, BLOOD, AND BONE
Bone of the father,

Unknowingly given,

You will revive

Your son.

Flesh of the servant,

Willingly given,

You will revive 

Your master.

Blood of the enemy,

Forcibly taken,

You will resurrect

Your foe.


My Charm

You are my charm

I dream about you

I can’t sleep without hearing you

You are my charm

When I used to look in your eyes I used to see the stars

When I listen to your words I feel as if I’m listening to myself

I can’t stop thinking about you

You are my charm

When I hear your laugh I feel that my heart is jumping overly joyed

Really you make me happy

You are my charm

I feel satisfied when I speak to you

I adore you 

You are my charm

I never stop wondering about you

You make me alive

You are my charm

You are my charm

You are my charm


M.G.

It is hard to say goodbye to a friend who has passed on.

But you weren’t a friend

But I don’t know why,

I just liked you.

I used to feel happy seeing you laugh

You didn’t like me, 

I used to feel that

I forgive you for that

I forgive you for everything you did with me

Maybe your friends will forget you

But I will never forget you

I wish to see you again

I’ll miss you everyday

I wish you forgive me 

May we meet in paradise…

Desdemona

I raised my guts up in order to write this I stopped being fearful I decided to jump from above my barriers the barriers I created thousands of years ago. I did that because I was so afraid because I thought something would happen if I write anything about that obsession that have been controlling my head during the last period of time. But I challenge any thing would ever happen or could have happened. I will never care because I have nothing to lose even myself because I lost it away many years ago. My problem is a DEMON that has been controlling my life for so long, I used to speak to him when I am alone he made me fight every one was protecting me from him. He made me a more loner person than never before even my savior which was created by me I thought she was destroying my life but she turned out to be the one who was protecting me from that DEMON. When he found out that I found how I will be able to destroy him he threatened me that if I say anything about him he will take me to a place  harsher, darker, and more destructive than hell itself. I answered him and said “you don’t know what I faced in life because if  you know  what I faced you should be pretty sure that I am a person hard to be threatened even if it was a demon who is doing that because I don’t care for anything and especially you. I don’t fear you even in my worst dreams and what proves that is that I speak to you easily without even showing any care”. DESDEMONA yes I say your name I Don’t care do what ever you want. DESDEMONA is the devil that have been controlling my life for quite some time I created you and here I destroy you I’ll make you burn you really think I will fear a demon  I don’t fear any one that is something you should know even my savior I don’t need you any more because I can handle my situations by myself I can stand in front of a hail storm all myself. I’ll be your destructor , because I am unstoppable. What makes me unstoppable? I was born in a thunderstorm. DEMONS welcomed me on the day of my birth, do you think an earthquake happened occasionally on the day of my birth. My ability to see my future. My ability to feel Earth’s movement at night. My ability to see demons in people’s eyes. I see demons when ever I want to and I have the ability to burn them and make them bow down to me. Did you know what makes me unstoppable? I have the ability to change the world. What you don’t know I’ll be the world’s savior because I have the ability to change the world and turn it upside down. So do you think I will fear a small demon like you? Show me what you can do! You can do nothing. The problem I never challenged you before because I doubted myself I thought I grew weak but actually a person never grows weak instead he grows stronger day after day. Because the bullet that doesn’t kill a person it makes him much more stronger. So DESDEMONA I order you to fear me because if you don’t I will destroy you and bring you down on your knees I’ll make you beg for mercy and I’ll not grant  it I will make you cry blood for it. I’ll never ever forgive you because I never forgive I said forgive to be forgiven but you didn’t forgive so accept my hell I’ll turn you into ashes, I’ll destroy you. I’ll make sure you get to know the monster inside me you never knew or saw before. I’ll make you fear your shadow. This me speaking, every word I said I really mean it…

SO FEAR ME BECAUSE THE DEVIL DOES

Part Of My Unpublished Book

Book’s title: The Map Reformer

Life…

Living life is a challenge. Because life is not easy at all. It is the hardest thing ever. You go through a million of  bumps. All of these bumps cause you injuries but some a bearable and others are not bearable at all. Some end just as the circumstances you are passing ends and some stay for life time even if you try to forget them. Life has terms you have to live according to them in order to survive. because if you don’t follow them your wound will be more powerful.

But first of all do you what do I mean by terms?

When I say terms I mean rules you have to follow. The terms of life are never easy. They are the harshest rules you’ll ever see in your whole life. Who created those terms? Really  I don’t know. And I don’t care about that. It is not GOD by the way who I mean of course. Because these terms were created by a tyrant who is heartless. In fact these terms were created by no one. These terms should be in each one’s mind when treating today’s mankind. Because if you don’t you’ll suffer a lot.

The most important of these terms and the one’s you should really follow:

  1. Love is totally FORBIDDEN
  2. Never trust any one
  3. Never allow people to see you weak
  4. Don’t care about anyone but yourself
  5. Never forgive
  6. Never look back at the past

As you see these terms are not easy for a person with a heart. So it can be concluded that if you are a person with a heart in this life you’ll be crushed easily and without mercy so to stand and not get crushed you have to kill your heart before someone does. Because if you kill your heart yourself you will still have a part of it but if some one kills your heart you heart will be devastated and you will be shattered apart losing everything. In fact I don’t live according to these terms because I don’t have the enough guts to kill my heart because every time I try to do that I feel frightened.

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